"Raise your tongue and heart from attacking Muslims and from having bad opinion of them. If you dislike someone and if you are able to give them sincere advice then do so. Purify your heart and tongue, stop them from attacking Muslims, by mentioning their faults. And in your heart by thinking bad of others. Beware of having a bad opinion of a Muslim even if he disobeys Allah because you don't know how his ending will be. Backbiting and bad opinion is not the deen of Allah, nor it is the deen of Prophet Muhammad s.a.w, but the deen of devil. The deen of Prophet Muhammad s.a.w is that believers are all brothers. Avoid backbiting and do not mix with people who backbite."
"Don't make fun of others. Avoid suspicion as much as possible for it is a sin. Would you like to eat the flesh of your brothers? What tells you that he is going to die in the state of disbelief? Have etiquette with Allah concerning His creations. If you backbite then you will have committed two sins. Firstly, you are guilty for not sincerely advising them, secondly, you are guilty of attacking them."
"Have good opinion of others. You are not responsible for them. Don't make judgments of people. You are a reminder and not a controller."
Habib Umar then quoted Imam Al-Haddad's teachings:
"Do not see yourself as superior to any Muslims. Reflect upon how your ending would be. Don't be proud or arrogant. Think about how your ending will be. You cannot be certain about other people's misdeeds but you can be certain about yourself and your sickness in the heart. Why leave this certainty about yourself in favor of assumptions on other people? Don't be happy about people's praise when you know your own true state with certainty. The more increase in knowledge you may have, the more you should feel conscious about your ignorance. No one can be certain about other people's faults but one can be certain of one's own faults. You have to take yourself to account. As for your brothers, you should excuse them thinking maybe they do this/that for this/that reason. Do not be judging or attacking other people. Have etiquette with the One who hides people's ending. Have etiquette with Allah concerning His creations."
- Extracts of Habib Umar's lesson as translated by Ustaz Amjad Tarsin
I remembered reading a tweet by Samah Al-Nachawati: "I don't like what you are doing but I respect who you are. Because maybe who you are tomorrow will be better than who I am today."