December Twenty Eighteen | Khabar terakhir...mungkin

Bismillah.

Ahhh...I have been busy elsewhere, and I am still busy with my studies...but I was reminded of this space I have been loyal to for the past nine years when I saw someone on Insta posted a very pretty photo of his bike at Maida Vale tube station in London. 'Maida Vale' was like one sharp blade that cuts open one of many memories I had collected from this blog. That's why I am here today, to register my thoughts, recollect my feelings and reflect upon them. But nah...I refrain from elaborating my 'Maida Vale' story cos it's not worth it. I want to stay curious as to who would come crawling seeking forgiveness at Mahsyar for having wronged me and my family.

Looking back, I feel good cos for every inconvenience and harm, there's a reward from Allah. There have been big rewards from Allah, I am humbled and delighted. I think the best part about winning after having surrendered to the decree of Allah, was when some people thought you were losing. Anyways, I pray Allah converts all our misdeeds and helps us purify our intentions every step of the way.    

Some people have problems with me speaking my mind here. But that's their problem. They going around campaigning against me, that's their problem. They looked down on me as a woman, forgetting they have children under their responsibilities, that's their problem. They were arrogant about their background, image, network, bla bla bla, that's their problem. But if they did cast 'sihir' on me, I pray the evil return to them and their clan.

This space is special for the numerous lessons I learned. This space is special for the times that it has witnessed - my journey, both tangible and spiritual journey, for close to 10 years. I can safely say that I am not some new kid on the repentant journey who gets overzealous in wanting to do religious works, thinking he/she is the select few who understood better the meaning of 'amal jariah', sincerity, etc.

When I revisited my old postings on lessons/notes from majlis taalim, it became clearer to me that I knew nothing and that it was a pure gift from the Lord that I became both a receptacle and conveyor to some extent. I have always believed that each one of us will find the lessons we need at the appointed time therefore, it does not matter how many followers this blog has. It had reached its seekers and it will continue to reach its seekers, God Willing. 

From the bottom of my heart, thank you, you genuine readers who are not here to find faults, you genuine readers who are here to see the good and leave the not so good. Thank you for being a part of my nine years' of experiences thus far. May Allah reward you abundantly for your good thoughts and wishes.

***

Ketulusan hati terhadap qada dan qadar Allah; bersangka baik terhadap takdir Allah, itulah senjata kekuatan hati buat saya selama ini bi-iznillah. Hampir 10 tahun berlalu di ruangan sederhana ini, saya bersyukur atas setiap yang disaksi mata hati, atas setiap rasa yang terbit di sanubari, atas setiap renungan pengajaran yang membina jiwa.

Terima kasih diucapkan kepada pembaca yang ikhlas masih setia melanggani blog sehingga ke hari ini walaupun saya sudah jarang-jarang di sini. Saya memohon maaf kepada pembaca-pembaca yang jujur terhadap saya, yang pernah mengenali saya secara peribadi atau menerusi karya di sini, bahawa saya sudah tidak lagi berupaya memberi sesuatu yang mungkin anda hajati. Namun saya yakin, anda, pembaca yang bersikap benar terhadap saya, anda sangat matang menilai peredaran waktu dan tuntutan kepada perubahan. Dan hakikat bahawa setiap sesuatu itu ada naik turunnya serta pasti ada pengakhirannya.

Sekali lagi, terima kasih kerana menemani saya di sini selama ini.

Moga Allah memberi anda kurnia yang hebat-hebat atas sangka baik anda terhadap diri saya dengan segala kekurangan yang ada pada diri saya.

Fi amanillah.

WaSalamualaikum warahmatullah.

E.Ismail
Lisan al-Din writer
April 2009 - December 2018

    

   

48

Bismillah.

Alhamdulillah wa shukrulillah, to have lived thus far. I will be 48 tomorrow inShaAllah. No, I am not shy about revealing my real age. Some blog readers thought the age I had been disclosing was a fictitious number. I don't belong with those who aren't proud of the time that Allah has given them. If I were God, I would cut five years from their "shelf-life" since they are shy to be on the "shelf", you get what I mean? And since I am open and grateful for my age, I hope the Almighty would add five more years to the pre-determined period. LOL.

What would I/you do if we were given a bonus of five years? I could/might do a Ph.D. and write a book but that sounds like just another "big-ticket" item. The countless good intentions and small deeds that we might/could do within five years would carry a lot more marks than the seemingly major activities, like the prostitute who got to enter the Heaven for the mercy she showed towards a thirsty dog. She gave him/her water. (Refer links below for this 'Whore & Dog' story)

Perhaps, a major lesson in that narration is that no matter what business/life plans we have, what would be more crucial is the degree of mercy/kindness/positivity we show towards others - both man and animals, on the day to day basis. And...frankly speaking, I am worried to be taking more than giving and whilst I "give", it is substandard in the Book of the Lord. At the very least, I hope the messages that I had been posting, were able to touch your heart albeit in the faintest manner.  

Having said that, I cannot promise to be nice to everyone. To be frank I had blocked one reader from communicating with me because he asked me how I handled my nafs and that he talked about being a healthy male and a sapiophile. [Sorry bro, I don't care if you are an avid reader of this blog. I can't entertain chats like that].

So now you know some of the questions people asked me. If I had not stopped the conversation, I would perchance lose two months of my life just replying to messages like that. I am sure you would all agree with me that Whatsapping, FB Messengers, IG messaging etc. eat up a lot of our time. Yeah.. it would get worse for me personally when Semester 2 begins. But I must thank the Lord really that my office workload has been very light this year Alhamdulillah.

By the way, this one thing I heard a couple of days ago truly impressed upon the heart. About Asma binti Abu Bakar who tore her belt into two just so that she could fasten some food supply onto a camel. It was for the sake of Prophet Muhammad salallah alaihiwasalam and her father Sayidina Abu Bakar who were then leaving their secret hideout at Thawr Cave. For her ingenuity, the Prophet named Asma as 'She of the two belts' (Zatun Nithaqhain).

Would you do the same? Would you tear up your belt? Would you be clever when a situation warrants you to be clever in coming up with a quick solution?  

This hijrah story about the closeness of friendship between the Prophet salallah alaihiwasalam and Sayyidina Abu Bakar never failed to make me shed tears, every single time.  

I reckon I have got more than 48 scarves, what good are they for the faith which I believe in? Is it good enough as a symbol for being a Muslim? There must be more to it, there must be a lot more we could do to benefit others, no matter how small the gesture, even half a belt counts! 

Thanks for reading.
Wish you a wonderful month of Muharram and a sweet September - what's left of it.

E.I
24 September 2018

***

Further readings on the 'Whore & Dog' story:
http://seekershub.org/ans-blog/2011/05/04/forgiving-major-sins-and-the-hadith-of-the-prostitute-who-gives-water-to-the-thirsty-dog/

http://www.madeenah.com/if-the-reward-for-giving-water-to-a-dog-is-jannah-then-how-about-teaching-tawheed-to-the-people/

A story about Asma binti Abu Bakar (in Malay though)
http://assalambs.blogspot.com/2012/05/kenali-asma-binti-abu-bakar-as-siddiq.htmlv

Evolving

Bismillah.

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah,

Allahu Hu Allah, I really don't know how to begin addressing the questions and remarks made by a reader of Lisan al-Din who had approached me on another social media platform. I feel obligated to reply because he has been reading this blog for many years, long enough to notice that this space has evolved, that my postings have evolved and that he seemed to respect and understand the evolution. I am obliged to reply because I understand how it feels to be a Muslim who yearns to know more about our raison d'etre vis-a-vis the Lord. I can only write from my own experiences, needless to say. And oftentimes the person who tries to answer might end up learning more from the questioners.

So it all started with hard rubs LOL. Rumi said, "If you are irritated by every rub, how will you be polished?" Initially, I felt like the Lord rubbed me really hard and I felt overwhelmed. The moment I started feeling overwhelmed, I began taking major actions. No, I shouldn't say "I" was the initiator, it was the state itself that moved me as a mere actor. I remembered feeling engulfed by a strong desire to wear hijab, I was overtaken by a strong power that couldn't possibly be me (my own will). I remembered feeling overwhelmed about starting this blog and naming it Lisan al-Din, it was like telling me "Hey you, I am going to make you do it", I was shaking, feverish in fact. It just had to happen, no two ways about it. What I'm trying to say is that we are weak and we can merely respond to a stronger force that controls us. Who is in control of us who holds us by the forelock? Let's say it's He. He made me thirsty for books on Sufism for many years, He sent it to me through a vessel of His choice, He made me read them feverishly, and He imparted some understanding into my heart. All we could do is embrace His actions and motivations on us. La hawla wala quwwata illah billah. 

Dr. E, (the questioner), if you were able to notice how I have changed over the years, I mean since you're able to observe the changes, the evolution of my soul through my sharing/postings which I had knowingly or unknowingly exposed to the public for the past 10 years, then you have seen Him, for He is Time. It was all a manifestation of His af'al (actions) and attributes (Names/Sifat). We are merely a receptacle. Yet He wants us to know Him. We should not just be a dumb passive receptacle, we should be one who has a discerning heart to notice His gestures, to notice His presence, His omnipresence and subsequently glorifies Him.

I remembered Shaykh Yaqoubi and a few more shuyukh elucidating the real meaning of a Quranic phrase about the obligation to worship Allah. Worship, as I understood from them is wide and beyond the physical acts of worship. One important aspect of it is to know Him through His asma', sifat and af'al (His Names/attributes and actions). Yes, in our search for better understanding or rather better realization of who He is, we walked and we walked, we met so many teachers, some were genuine, some were fake, some were riding the religion, few actually supported the religion, some were attracted to my appearance and keen to marry me, some were interested in collecting funds and support for their ongoing religious projects, some had reps to woo people so we belong with their fraternity and not others, and there are as you know it, so many religious WhatsApp groups out there. We learned from them, we learned about them and about ourselves too. It's easy to get tired along the journey. But let's not be fooled by misunderstandings or the complexities that some religious people try to impose on the religion because He has made the deen easy for us. So don't let anyone complicate it for us. Take it simply as it is.

For the past two years or so, it was clear to me, that it was time to re-prioritize my time, to spend more time reading and reflecting on the Quran, making plenty of selawat and focusing on one route to Jannah through my dear mother, to attend to her as best as I could. 

Dr. E, do not fret, do not worry about knocking on so many doors or finding which path to take, just focus on the opportunity that is before your eyes right now, that is to serve others through your field. I understood the wise words of the mu'aleem, the shortest way to the Lord is through khidma (service). So serve right there where you are. Because He is so near, we tend to not see. 

I think the best antidote when the vision gets fuzzy is to reflect upon a verse of the Quran:   

"We will show them Our signs in the horizons and in their own souls until it becomes clear to them it is the truth. Is it not sufficient that your Lord is witness to all things?"

So let's keep looking out for His signs until it becomes clearer.

On a lighter note, that's why lately, I'd like to take it easy and love going to the beach to enjoy the horizons, laze on a hammock and contemplate on my own soul. 

LOL

But on a serious note, whenever my mother calls on me for a favor I take it as my ticket to Heaven. Likewise, you, whenever someone seeks your medical service, consider it your shortest route to Him. If you happen to have the time to visit some majlis ta'alim, or you don't, so be it. Should we bump into something that doesn't seem right to our heart, we say next! Because it is sufficient that He is our witness to all things.

Allahu a'lam.

E.I

8 September 2018

Remember: On the horizons and in yourselves!

  

31st August 2018 | Malaysia turns 61

Bismillah.

This is a backdated posting, don't be fooled LOL.

I was busy on other social media platforms and busy holidaying in Penang that I overlooked to mark this special occasion here on this blog of mine. But the good thing about the blogosphere is that you have the freedom to backdate or postdate as you wish.

This photo was taken by me of course as I was frolicking on the Batu Ferringhi beach a couple of days before Malaysia turned 61. Alhamdulillah it is Allah who decided and willed on which land we landed at birth, and get to call home, and on which land we shall die. I gotta thank this beautiful country Malaysia, for having me. I ought to thank Allah that He lets me walk on this land peacefully and not let the earth gobble me up due to my sins. Verily, I seek refuge in Allah from Allah. This may sound paradoxical to some people as it did to me before. I understood it as seeking refuge in the mercy of Allah from His wrath.

I must thank one of this blog readers for giving me a sort of wake-up call, he reminded me of my own blog LOL. As I said, I have been busy elsewhere and neglected this old space of mine. I love this space as it has been a loyal receptacle of my thoughts and feelings, a place to document my experiences and memories. I realize that every time I start writing, as I begin knocking on the keypads, it's akin to knocking on the shells of my outer being, breaking it up to expose the kernel. Hence, it is a private thing. Writing is very personal except for the postings in which I regurgitated all that I had heard from the shuyukh from the majalis that I had been privileged to attend. 

So this is it, a little something to mark this special date. In the next posting, I will make an attempt to answer some questions that were posed by one Lisan al-Din long time reader who lives 9000 km away.

Cheers! 

E.I
8.9.2018

Selamat Hari Raya Aidil Adha | Eid Mubarrak 1439 H

Bismillah.

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah,
Hi folks here's wishing you and your family a blissful Eid celebration 😀

Alhamdulillah for the tawfik from Allah that we were able to enliven the eve of Eid, pray Allah would enliven our hearts with His remembrance, that our hearts are always in the state of prostration to Him Al Kabir, hoping for His endless mercy and bounties.

Alhamdulillah for times of ease, to have the freedom of being away from the office for 19 days. YaHuuu...here we go again, another round of long leave.

Allah Kareem!

p/s

It was a pleasant surprise to hear the Imam recite a verse I'm familiar with.
"Wujuhun yau maizin na'emah"
You know what that means?
No? Go read the Quran some more, that would be better for you than spying on me LOL.

Colorful life

Bismillah.

Hi folks,

Hope you are all enjoying the hot summer days. Well, it depends on where you are. Anyway, either hot or cold, it's all from Allah, so let's refrain ourselves from complaining even in the mildest of remarks. At least to most of us, He does not send a weather that is harmful. 

I am thrilled to be back in my hometown - Penang, yet again. Alhamdulillah wa shukrulillah to have a decent shelter to call my own. And the currency rate is good ; ) We have to enumerate our blessings clearly and specifically you know. 

It's the auspicious times of ZulHijjah Alhamdulillah. I should start spring-cleaning the house a.s.a.p to prep it for Eid aul-Adha celebrations InShaAllah. And...I am so looking forward to visiting a maqam of a saint in the heart of George Town. 

OK folks, may we belong with those who add colors to a person's monochromatic life. May we belong with those who give hope and put a smile on someone's face.

 ; )

Selfishly busy

Bismillah.

Alhamdulillah wa shukrulillah

We gotta be selfishly busy loving our lives unless you want to pay someone to live it for you? Lol

My longggg holiday is almost over. Alhamdulillah that Allah continues to bless our time that we have the opportunity to spend it with our loved ones for things that matter most.

I am also grateful that Allah has given me the strength to be fierce about protecting my rights and dignity that I don't hold back when I need to stand up and speak up. If you were to reflect a little deeper you will realize that in regards to our association with Allah, it's always a win-win. Even when it seems like you are losing, He would actually facilitate for you to come out of the 'loss' as a winner. That is why we have to always have husnul zan towards Him, have good expectations of Him. He is indeed fair and All-Knowing, so keep calm, let Him say "Be!" cos it is His prerogative, whereas our task is simply to embrace it as it is.

Keep smiling.

Be grateful and say your thanks to Him a lil extra if He happens to give you a great smile. For there are just so many people around us upon whom Allah has given sufficient provision yet they find it hard to crack a smile. How stingy they are and verily that tightness, their constriction is a reflection of their self-inflicted punishment.

It might also be a punishment from the Lord for the wrongs they did unto others.

So rejoice if you are among those who are blessed with a cheerful countenance.

18 days off | Off the beaten path

Bismillah.

Alhamdulillah wa shukrulillah my 18-days holiday has just begun. Hmm...not quite a holiday cos it's punctuated by two exams but yass...the rest is holi holiday YaHuuu Allah Kareem indeed!

A reminder for me and you to be brave and be daring to take a different path.

Towering genius disdains a beaten path.
It seeks regions hitherto unexplored.
- Abraham Lincoln

Happy blissful Friday!

Eza

Ahahhh...this is more like it lol.

A smile is your best curve ; )
 20 July 2020 

- a good date to get married!?

Let's see.

: )
Peace out!

Pocketing prosperity

Bismillah.

Alhamdulillah wa shukrulillah!

For an awesome evening listening to people's success stories. You know you have the right attitude when your heart expands and grin from your right armpit to your left armpit just hearing about a person's success stories. LOL.

It's important to have the right attitude about wealth and prosperity. The experts say it's not about creating wealth, it's about tuning oneself to the frequency of wealth, it's about being in the same wave with fortune. In other words, we gotta psychologically pocket it before it makes way to our pockets or purse. I know it doesn't make sense to some people but do ponder, meditate and reflect. I have been trying to internalize it as I am open to new ideas and possibilities.

This small sharing is for my nieces and nephews so they would give it a thought. But of course, they would still be hoping their aunt would 'belanja' (treat) them lol.

I can't wait to finish my exams and go chill with them my loved ones.

May Allah make us more grateful for all His gifts bestowed upon us in the past, present and future.

Ameen.

 Cheers!

Felicitations! | Kudos!

Bismillah.

Felicitations to all the great French men on the pitch in Moscow tonight, and of course to all French men and women for their victory. What else can a fan say? : D

Twenty years ago, I told my then partner who was a footballer himself, that I saw something about France early in the 1998 tournament, that they might end up winning the World Cup, but he dismissed my women's instinct. Poor guy LOL. 

This year, again my instinct proved right and I am so very happy especially for all the visitors of this blog from France cos they are the all-time second highest country-visitors to this blog, after Malaysia.

Croatia as a smallish country with a mere 4 million population yet this young nation could be so skillful, brave and talented on the world stage the way they performed tonight, for that they truly deserved a hats-off. Kudos!

If there's one serious takeaway from the game, especially for our youth, amidst the fun, is that health can create wealth. Cos if you really polish your physical performance you could excel in your chosen field. Of course, mental performance is a subset of one's physical prowess. So let the youth take heed and use their youth-time wisely and always move forward. 

If I could turn back time, I would undo some mistakes I did during my youth phase. I am just grateful that Allah has given me plenty of opportunities to redeem myself and I think regardless of our age, every day should be a day to better ourselves in every way possible because it is even more sinful to think that you are already good and have got nothing to be remorseful about. So, embrace life more positively and move forward. 

There's one French proverb we all should try to learn:

Qui n'avance pas, recule.

"Who does not move forward, recedes.

Anyway, let's have scrumptious croissants for breakfast this Monday morning. 

LOL.

Je t'aime!

-Eza

     

p/s

How can I not love France when they have got a lovely place called Chateau Eza! Let's see who will take me there ; )

Ref: https://www.fluentu.com/blog/french/french-proverbs/

The tough gets going

Bismillah.

Alhamdulillah wa shukrulillah.
It's time to study, study and study for exams.
But first, when the going gets tough, go Haagen Dazs : )
Also to treat my dear mother who loves it, who doesn't?

"Tough times never last but tough people do."
Dr Robert Schuller

I am okay despite that a-wee-bit stressful look before the ice cream arrives at our table.
LOL

"How beautiful to find a heart that loves you
without asking you for anything
but to be okay."
- Khalil Gibran

To all the wonderful and kind hearts out there, who continually wish me well for my exams and all my undertakings, who pray for me from a distance - may Allah bless you with a lot more bounties than what you have wished for me.

"Kindness in words creates confidence.
Kindness in thinking creates profoundness.
Kindness in giving creates love."
- Lao Tzu

Like a tree

Bismillah.


So today I had to appear like a tree for a campaign at work.

I am reminded of the sayings of the Lord:
A good word is like a good tree 
whose root is firmly fixed 
and 
its branches high in the sky.

Go green!
Save a tree!

Behind every cute tree
there stands a ghost LOL
#kitaboleh

De Quervain duhh!

Bismillah.

Teno
Syno
Vitis

The orthopedic surgeon who attended to me today taught me this medical terminology. He actually broke up the three parts and explained to me how the term is coined. LOL.

Teno is tendon

Syno is like a membrane.

Vitis means inflamed.

If I recalled correctly.

It's a disease named after the person who discovered it - De Quervain.

So that's the first thing the doc said to me - "You got De Quervain disease."

I went like: what disease?!

LOL.

Anyway, I am sharing this with you so that you will know should it happen to you cos it's pretty common among those who are dexterous : D

Nahh ...I mean those who do lots of typing and carry heavy loads of groceries etc.

    

It affects a specific spot on your wrist.

The pseudo-GP might mistake it for carpal tunnel but it's not it.

Ok go google carpal tunnel now. LOL.

So the doc gave me the hardest...toughest jab I have had in a long time. And I was impressed by the doctor's knowledge on hakikah and adab.

As if to protect me from hidden polytheism he reminded me just before he poked that fat needle.

Recite selawat and remember that it is not me or this medicine that cures you, it is Allah who cures you.

MashaAllah.

And he prayed so that I belong with 70% of the population, those who only need one jab. Else the pain might still be there and I will need another jab. It all depends on your rezeki he said.

The jab was pretty tough so I called upon Allah Al Latif to be a lil gentle on me.

I would like to think that I am his first patient who made zikir ya Latif loudly during the procedure 

: )

Alhamdulillah, Allah is ever so kind that He caused the disease to manifest on my left wrist instead of my right wrist cos soon I will sit for 3 hours + 3 hours written exam! Allah is kind indeed.

So kind, that when we are ill, we get to see one of the best specialists in town.

That we didn't have to wait long to get an appointment.

That someone pays for our medical bills.

Yes, we have to be specific in counting our blessings.

Alhamdulillah wa shukrulillah.

Dexterous me?
Hah hah hah...
Teno sino vitis
De Quervain punya hal LOL

Sporting Spirit

Bismillah.

Whether you support Brazil (BRA) or Spain (ESP) it does not really matter, cos the Krispy Kreme donuts are delicious you wanna eat them a hat-trick LOL.

My left wrist is injured so I can play all positions (ehem...ehem...) except goalkeeper ; )

But...if I were one, I would keep shifting the goalpost cos success should be a moving target right?

This season, let's keep our sporting spirits high.

: D

An "A" | Going for it

Bismillah.

Alhamdulillah wa shukrulillah.

Here I am, O Allah, thank you for another day!

Grateful that it's Tuesday morning and yet I have the freedom of being at home to do what is most important for me - read and work on my MBA assignment.

I am not shy to admit that I am aiming for an "A" and an overall distinction because we are supposed to always aim for the best plus it would look good on my CV, to have another distinction. Bi-iznillah. So, God please HELP me! Ameen.

Alhamdulillah, I am glad to be sending out this message of gratefulness to the universe for everything that is going on in my life right now. Including a twisted wrist LOL.

I am grateful that I have discovered a good dietary supplement brand made in USA, a halal one, that I am consuming it regularly and I have also become an agent, Yass! So that, next time if people made a positive remark about my seemingly "youthful" look, I could preach to them on the importance of taking high-quality dietary supplements. LOL. Cos if you don't, you might end up carrying heavy eye-bags that look like they have been someone's punching bags for three decades - punctured and bruised. LOL. No, we don't want that, I mean let's try to avoid that bi-iznillah cos Allah is Beautiful and He loves Beauty.

More importantly, may Allah beautify our akhlak just as He has beautified our appearance. And may the beauty of our heart shines on our countenance.

It's Tuesday a.m.
God, help me with my studies, please!
And my niece H and nephew A,
we are all studying like mad LOL

Allahumma salli ala Sayyidina Muhammad
wa ala ali Sayyidina Muhammad
sollatan tuwas si'u biha 'alainal arzak
wa tuhas sinu biha lanal akhlak
wa 'ala alihi wa sahbihi wasalim

[Salawat Tausi'ul Arzak]
In case you haven't memorized it yet.


p/s
Those nail colors are halal/breathable/water permeable, by the way.
A friend remarked: "With nail colors on, people might think you are forever having your menses and not praying" LOL. I said: "It's OK, God knows it's water permeable. I pray towards Him, it does not matter what the mortals think."

Right where we are

Bismillah.

So...can I disagree with my doctor who directed me to put on a wristband for two months? Great Lord, Alhamdulillah ala kulli hal, praise be to Allah regardless of the circumstances we are in.

So...I missed my study-group meeting tonight. In fact, I kinda miss my project-groups, my classmates, my clan - Mac Lean. 'Virtue mine honor' that's our motto. We have got two more assignments to complete before the finals. Alas, I am not in my top form today. Every day counts.

But we are right where we are as destined by the Orchestrator. We cross path with whomever He wishes for us at the appointed time and not an hour sooner. But then again our souls are evergreen and for a soul to be warm with another soul in this realm it could only mean one thing, that it was already warm and cordial in the realm of the spirits. We were in the same ranks then, so we click pretty well now. Our souls are evergreen, I am convinced.

No matter the circumstances, pray: Oh Lord, keep me in Your loving "arms" for I know I am loved.

Apologetically me | Rambling unapologetically

Bismillah.

Alhamdulillah wa shukrulillah to have arrived safely in my fave city - KL. Praise be to Allah for carrying us safely here and there.

Because this is my personal space I have always unapologetically posted things "as is". But today, this 'apologetically me' would like to apologize to someone for blocking him on our meeting channel. LOL... cos I am a girl and that's pretty common yeah!

[Please F... it's not that I disliked you ya. I think you know your "Dear Bud" somehow yeah!]

I have never done a public apology like this before, ever. But it's Syawal yeah...

And...I would like to clarify for some readers who have commented on my "fair skin". No, I am NOT as fair as I might have appeared in most of the photos. I might have appeared fair and attractive thanks to the lighting in situ and Samsung Note 8. LOL.

I am as tanned [read: exotic] as ever LOL. Pale\porcelain white has never been in trend by the way. LOL.

Sorry folks, I just gotta do this here. If truth be told I am exhausted from driving long-distance and I just needed to get this important message out and I needed to write from the heart.

Signing off as Ezza who wished she had more E.I (emotional intelligence).

: D

So here...my bare-faced photo. Trying to look/pretend to be innocent LOL.

  I missed my Penang home already : (

Post-Subuh this morning.
Gelugor, Penang.
Bismillahi tawakkaltu alallah wala hawla wala quwwata illah billah

Eid-ing in Penang 2018 | Gelugor & Batu Feringghi

Bismillah.

Just this...for now.
Eid-ing at my two homes in Penang.
May Allah grant us more marvelous bounties for we say our thanks to Him regularly.

"Second home" in Batu Feringghi.
Alhamdulillah. Let's proclaim the bounties of our Lord.

Delighted to put this seafood dish together especially for my young huffaz lovelies.
I mean it was my idea but my sister executed (cooked) it. LOL.

Selamat Hari Raya AidilFitri.

Eid Mubarrak 1439 H | Raya 2018

Bismillah.

If truth be told, this is a backdated posting cos I am flat tired recuperating from entertaining close to 200 kids who visited on the eve of Eid and on the first day of Eid. That I did not bother taking a proper Eid photo just like everyone else.

But hey... here's a relatively decent one (albeit sweaty lol) taken on the eve of Raya when we had our annual tradition of welcoming children and a young imam for tahmid and takbir recitals. Alhamdulillah for good times.

Here's wishing all my friends/readers old and new ones a merry Raya. Eid Mubarak!
Maaf zahir batin.

Taqabballallahu minna wa minkum taqabbal ya Kareem.

Will upload photos of my young guests.
This has become mandatory cos they insisted I showed them their Raya photos from the past years. Mannn! And kids say the darndest things.
Some funny questions they asked:
"What did you do to become so rich!?"
"Where do you work?"
"How long have you been working?"
"Are you a Boss?"

LOL
I just laughed off and said Ameen....
And this year I had to settle a small argument among them LOL.
God bless them - children!

And let's not forget those who are less fortunate, those who are going through a rough patch. Let's pray Allah Al Basith will expand His limitless bounties on them Ameen.

Best Wishes,
Eza


p/s 
It's ok if one is too busy and had to skip wearing lipliner or mascara whatever...LOL as long as she wears the sweetest smile ok?
: )


p/s
Listening to Aishah's Raya songs on repeat.
"...sekadar doa mengiring diri
setitik cahaya untuk meniti
pedoman buat di hari muka
moga ketenangan teman nan setia..."

My Quran moment | The best of days and nights

Bismillah.

Alhamdulillah wa shukrulillah for the best days of our lives - the days when we are with the Quran.

Alhamdulillah wa shukrulillah for each and every time the Ever Generous Lord grant us the satisfaction of that intimate Quran moment, only we know.

They say, he who tastes, knows.

May, by the light of Quran, by our commitment and attachment to the Holy Book, may Allah have mercy on us and grant us the joy of the best of nights. Amin. 

  

May Allah make our hearts attached to the Quran.

May Allah make us conscious of our nearness to Him through that which comes from Him, 

to that which is qadim.

Amin.

In conjunction with this blessed period of Ramadan,

I seek forgiveness for any shortcomings on my part.

Catch up again on Eid, 

In Sha Allah.

Allahu Akram

Bismillah.

Praise be to Allah for His generosities and how He keeps surprising us with delightful bounties.

On a lighter note, my Creator knows me well obviously so that's why He brought me to the world on the 25th day of a Gregorian month cos He already knew that's going to be pay-day LOL.

But the 25th of May 2018 was a wee bit more special. I am here to mark my gratitude so that say...on the 25th May of 2020 or 2022 I could look back and be thankful again.

Dalai Lama said and it is a good universal lesson regardless of one's creed,

"Live a good honorable life. Then, when you get older and think back, you'll be able to enjoy it a second time."

:)

Ramadan Kareem 1439 H

Bismillah.

Alhamdulillah wa shukrulillah, to be alive to witness this sacred month yet again.

It's 8th of Ramadan, and only today have I got some spare time to leave a mark of gratitude on this space for nikmat ijad - the blessings of being alive, for having an existence in this realm. This lesson on nikmat ijad I heard from my first guide/ustaz. Apparently, there's a second part to it called nikmat imdad and this I learned from a reliable source on the internet - an Islamic Centre based in Seremban, Malaysia. It refers to the blessings of the physical body, hearing, sight, intelligence, spirit, life's comfort, job, food and drinks, assets etc. 

In this blessed month of Ramadan, may Allah grant us the tawfiq and hidayah to show much more gratitude for these blessings of both ijad & imdad. 

[On a lighter note, I am wishing for a brownie point from the Lord for sharing this small piece of knowledge about these LOL]

And yes, more importantly, for me, I wish for His guidance in sorting out my priorities and in giving hukum waqt its due, that is to acknowledge the rules/rights of time. That we remain focused on our own priorities and not be distracted by anything else cos we all run a unique race, just that we want to be fast as in fastabiqul khairat in the race of good deeds.

How many pages of the Quran, have I read today? One should ask oneself. Never mind those who hardly read it because when it comes to measuring our efforts on select performance objectives i.e. reading Quran, Qiyamulail etc. we should compare with those who appear to be ahead of us. Set the desired parameter, a valid one and hustle.

In this blessed month of Ramadan, may Allah give us the tawfik to rub off all the rusts in our heart so we could see with better heart-vision.

9th May 2018 | Destiny Day

Bismillah.

Today is the day when my right hand "carried" my hopes and one sole intention witnessed by the Almighty. It's a day when it matters a great deal to get the left index finger stained for a good reason.

I started voting at Malaysia's General Election since I was 22. That's 25 years ago Subhanallah time flies! At that time, many of my friends who had just come home to Malaysia after having studied in the US for several years thought I was a bit strange to be bothered about exercising my rights. They thought it's not important as there's no urgency for it.

Today as Malaysia embraced the 14th General Election I realized many more young, first time voters turned up, somehow. That's a very good sign indeed.

Anyway, as a Malaysian citizen and as a Muslim, what's most important is that Allah has heard my prayers during the wee hours today. He knew my intention when I made my choice. He knows everyone's intentions and wishes. In any case, His plans shall come to be. No matter the outcomes, may Allah continue to grant us the blessing of living in a peaceful and prosperous country. Ameen.

Hasbunallahu wanikmal wakil
Nikmal mawla wa nikman nasir

Merry May | Renew

Bismillah.

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah.

Praise be to Allah for today, for another opportunity to do better than yesterday. Monday had been fruitful for me and Tuesday is looking good as I sip some decaf Earl Grey tea at home. (How boring has she become, you might say, decaf coffee ok but not tea? LOL). Ah...but perhaps we should "decaf" our day from meaningless deeds and talks. And detox our life continually. 

May is looking awesome bi-iznillah. Ramadan is just around the corner.  YaHuuu!

Just wanted to record my amazement at the young ones who inspired me lately. The young lady who gave me a crash course on Statistics handed me her textbook on Stats. I considered myself blessed cos she almost gave it away as she did for her other books but somehow kept this one - one she would never have thought would end up with her mother's schoolmate LOL. On the cover of the textbook, she had Bismillah written on top and then to the side she wrote a simple but significant reminder. She wrote: "Tajdid niyyat" - meaning: renew your intention, and "study for the sake of Allah" that is to gain knowledge cos we are asked to read and acquire knowledge for as long as we live; and "do not study for the sake of exams". How spiritually smart! How often do we, students study and prep like mad for exams without realizing the subtle polytheism beneath that? And this precious reminder/lesson, I learned from one young bright lady. Ma Sha Allah.

In fact, the lesson is not just limited to the intention we secretly make when it comes to studying. We should renew our niyyat every single day. This I heard from Habib Ali Zaenal Abidin some years back. 

It's 10 am now, have you performed solat sunat Duha? Have you made a petition (du'a) to Allah? So that He grants us beneficial knowledge, that He grants us good/pure provision and deeds that are accepted.

  

   

Wish ya'll a terrific Tuesday.

May we feel renewed - feel renewed with new knowledge that we are acquiring; and feel energized by a renewed spirit.

p/s
I didn't realize some of my longtime friends are so "Statistically" intelligent. There's another friend who majored in Mathematical Statistics. MashaAllah. He gave me a good coaching yesterday. And my immediate superior at work too majored in Statistics. LOL. Alhamdulillah when the universe seems to be plotting to do you good.

Rabbi zidni ilma
war zuqni fahma 

Nisfu Shaaban | Anticipating Ramadhan

Bismillah.


Subhanallah.
The whitest of the White Nights in any given year has got to be the night of mid-Shaaban.

The lovely moon as captured by yours truly in Penang:

A full moon should remind one of no one else except Prophet Muhammad salallah alaihi wasalam. When the full moon of Shaaban appears, the anticipation for Ramadan heightens, naturally.

May Allah grant us the gift of Ramadhan
in all its purity. Ameen. 

p/s
Hoping my mother is impressed with those hydrangea 😍

Not invisible

Bismillah.

Alhamdulillah wa shukrulillah, the joy of working on my assignments in my backyard in Penang - on Monday : D 

Ahhh...the joy of being coached on statistics by someone half my age, who is the daughter of my schoolmate, a friend I have known since I was 7 years old! That's quite a bit of history eh? I could sense the pride and joy engulfing my friend, as she listened and watched her daughter teach me Statistics. It's kinda funny too LOL. But grateful I am to have found the help I needed cos I have become terribly rusty in Stats, Maths and the like. LOL.

Another much-treasured friend sent me an inspiring video about us not being invisible to God. It's obvious you say but how often we feel slighted when people act as if we're invisible. Allah knows and sees every little thing we do and it does not matter that we are invisible to mortals cos what matters is that the Creator, the Master, the Orchestrator the Keeper of All-Bounties does not treat us like we're invisible.

It's a joy to be able to help my mother clean and prep the house for Ramadhan. May Allah let us live to see Ramadhan and let us live in the way that is pleasing to Him now and forever and especially in Ramadhan bi-iznillah.

May Allah grant us the tawfiq to turn over a new leaf this Ramadhan. Ameen.  

Love all my genuine readers/supporters/visitors - for the sake of Allah.
- E.I

= Emotional Intelligence : D
Let's pray He grants us more E.I.

When He favors us again and again

Bismillah.

"God knows every person that's done you wrong, every injustice, every bad break. He's going to pay you back. You're going to come out fully compensated, blessed, vindicated, honored. People will know that God has ruled in your favor."

- From @TheSecretTeachings

And we all have seen His miracles, His generosities, His protection, His fairness, over and over again.

Subhanallah.

Journeying from Allah, with Allah, to Allah, for Allah.

Only take what you need

Bismillah.

Alhamdulillah wa shukrulillah for having had a wonderful experience exploring Lake Chini, the second biggest lake in Peninsula Malaysia.

One important takeaway for me - a lesson from the Orang Asli (aboriginal inhabitants of the area) - that we should only take what we need. I think nature has taught them this, as they hunt/seek food they would only take just enough supplies and leave the rest for the others. Likewise, when clothes were presented to them, they only chose what was needed. 

In the last photo that appeared in the clippings below, I was reminded of my childhood, how my worldview was limited, how lacking in exposure. However, we, many of us, when we were at their age, we were somewhat richer in terms of opportunities and possibilities. Thus, we should be grateful, be more grateful that Allah has destined for us all that He has destined for us. And let's do our bit in spreading cheer and more importantly, hope for a brighter future. 

[E.I's Travelogue for future reference]

Numbered | Scrumming

Bismillah.

Assalamualaikum folks,

Hi...hi...hi! Great to be back here after a week+ of hiatus. When you are not Instagramming or publicizing your actions, that does not necessarily mean you are not up and hustling. Alhamdulillah this is to express to the world of my gratitude of being alive and kicking. 

Life is like a cycle. When we were young, we spent the week being a student and the weekends to work part-time to survive college - not me but many of us. I partied on weekends or went shopping, to be frank, LOL. But now, it's the opposite, I work for three days during the week and spend the weekend as a student. After signing out I gotta watch Lynda.com for some lessons on Statistics to prep my mind for the real class InShaAllah. Mondays and Tuesdays are for recuperating and prepping some more. Perhaps meet an old buddy who is a maestro of Statistics to teach me some more. Alhamdulillah that's what friends are for. Praise be to Allah for all the wonderful people in our lives. Our days are numbered, so be friendly we must. But let's go for quality instead of quantity because we don't want to be negatively affected by blacksmith-friends, you know what I mean. Whenever you meet blacksmiths, be quick to convert them into the "Statistics of One's Ex". LOL.

Alhamdulillah, I am enjoying my job. I love that our culture is one which is super agile. I love being a scrum master for one of the squads at my workplace. Praise be to Allah for giving us the tawfiq to keep busy doing good things like acquiring new useful knowledge. We gotta be specific in thanking Allah because there are people who are busy acquiring immoral/useless stuff.

There are some married men in their 50s who keep themselves busy scrumming among women. Some of them have got four, five doctors in the family yet they cannot be cured still, the womanizing symptoms are still showing.

Oh somehow, some exes are thinking I'm as low as them. For God's sake, I'm marching on with my Quran recitation to Chapter 19. And they said Eza is just pretending to be good. Oh well, I say thank you, whatever good you see in me, is from Allah : )

Please...never mind me. Go take care of your unmarried daughters who are scrumming around boys and smooching them and what not. 

Excuse me, I am busy getting myself an education cos I'm not clever and education as we all know is a life-long journey after all, right until we reach the grave.

Peace out!

***

"I am the leader of this team. They have faith in me. I have to let go of the worry. Let go of the fear. I could curl up and cry at home. Not here."

- J. Sutherland (The Power of Scrum)

Monday boost

Bismillah.

Alhamdulillah wa shukrulillah to be writing from my home-office on a Monday. I feel like this space has been neglected somewhat and thus am feeling a lil bad for three reasons:

1. Writing is a good habit and a good cognitive exercise, anything good should be continued and maintained. At the beginning of 2017, I made an intention to write a lil something every day and I did. At the outset of 2018, I did not make the same niyat and naturally, psychologically, my entire being does not commit to daily writing. So I learn yet again that making an intention is key. Niyat is a fundamental pre-requisite for any actions. Did you know, writing, expressing oneself and keeping a journal are three out of 100 fun activities you could do to boost your mood, so they say. How many of the 100 items do you normally do? Refer poster below. I found it on Twitter earlier this morning. Twitter is my go-to place for inspirations and motivations on social media, not Instagram. It might be something else for you. To each her/his own. [But I have set up an Instagram account for lisanaldin! LOL.]

2. Blogging is considered as a hobby, obviously. Well, it wasn't that obvious to me until I was at an interview and was asked what my hobby was. I paused for longer than I should and said: "blogging". Gosh how boring a person I must be to not have any hobbies. So this blog has saved me in the interview LOL. I must keep it going InShaAllah.

3. I was made to understand the young ones in my family come here every now and then to chill whenever they need to take a break from their studies and college-pressures. Cos they found their aunt's postings kinda "humorous" [sometimes]. So, there's a demand for this insignificant blog. Oh no, wait, it is significant because we are all unique and only I can tell my own stories the way I do. No one else can do a better job being me/you other than me/you. Therefore, we have to celebrate being ourselves and being chosen by the Lord to be here on this Earth to serve a purpose and occasionally pick a fight with those who annoy us. LOL. Oh, yes, I am speaking [writing] my mind truthfully for this moment. Some people humiliated me and so I wrote about it and then they got mad that I got mad and wrote what I wrote about it. Whatever happens to freedom of speech or "freedom of feelings", for that matter? [If you don't want me to write a bad review for you, then stop doing bad things to me and/or replace your ugly actions with plenty of good deeds until all the murky water got replaced with crystal clear water. As simple as that.] 

Alhamdulillah wa shukrulillah, I keep thanking the Lord for having a 24-hour work week as I have more time to do Sunat Duha unlike before. It's actually not too difficult but of course, as a Muslim-novice like me, it's a big deal. I used to think that anyone who does duha prayer is super duper religious and I don't belong with them, but that's a wrong viewpoint, I now realize. It can be done. It's possible. I urge the young ones to give it a try. At the end of the day, Allah will look at the effort we put in, cos we all know hidayah and tawfik is His sole discretion anyway.

By the way, I am not apologizing that this space no longer serves the purpose that some of the old readers might be expecting - me sharing notes from majlis taalim cos I don't do that anymore. You all are smart people who frequent majlis taalim regularly and consistently so I imagine most of you have become a junior-shaykh/shaykha or something by now. Alhamdulillah, again, to each her/his own.

Gotta sign-off and do some office work. Yes I still do office work on Mondays voluntarily cos I love my job. And gotta do some revision for my MBA class. Oh, by the way, the first subject that will be covered is called the Learning Manager and the essence of that is "self-awareness" can you believe that? That we are supposed to reflect on ourselves and how we interact with others in the process of learning. That we are encouraged to have a "reflective learning journal". That Emotional Intelligence (EI) is emphasized a lot more than IQ. Wow!

OK folks, I gotta go now.

Best,

EI

(Eza Ismail)

: )

p/s

HE & AA - good luck in your studies and exams.

KA - best wishes for your new endeavor in the college of your choice. Bi-iznillah.

NS - wish you a speedy recovery. [I was going to type S for your short name but some "perasan" people might think I'm referring to them or their husband like they own certain alphabets. LOL]

Note to self:

Choose better feeling thoughts!

p/p/s
Speaking of boost, I have stopped buying smoothies from Boost cos I make my own nowadays. Alhamdulillah. Boost is also a brand name for an app which you may want to download. It's got nothing to do with smoothies, but you can buy Boost smoothies and everything else under the sun using the Boost app by Axiata.
: )

Home-made smoothies
[Banana, frozen blueberries, almond milk, frozen yogurt, honey, organic chia seeds, flax seeds, toasted muesli, ice]
 Yumms!

p/p/s

If you are a typical Malaysian like me who watched the AME award show on Astro last night, you would be singing and dancing (at home) to the famous song by Ruffedge - Khayalan.
Diriku sudah pun berpunya kekasih hati
Tak mungkin ku tukar ganti 
padamu yang datang dalam khayalan...
Carilah pengganti agar kau gembira lagi...

[Some of the Ruffedge guys attend majlis taalim regularly mind you!]